Day 1 in Denver

Teddy Kennedy was a late edition to last night's lineup of speakers. And the Senior Senator from Massachusetts noticeably struggled through his address, tugging on liberal heart strings from Portland, Oregon to Portland, Maine.


But it was Michelle Obama, or perhaps her daughters, who really stole the show. Her speech touched on how her and Barack first met, as well their first date over ice-cream. She focused more on Barack Obama the man, and steered clear of talking about Barack Obama the politician.

Michelle Obama (and her daughters for that matter) also suspiciously steered clear of talking about Barack Obama the elitist, secret fundamentalist Muslim. There was literally no mention of how Barack plans to be inaugurated with the Koran, or his designs on throwing out the first pitch at next year's Nats opening day wearing a turban.

Nice try, Michelle. But we're not buying it. Even if you are the most attractive wife of a candidate since Elizabeth Kucinich - and you are - we here at Muck Breaker think it's high time you come clean about your husband's true secret (elitist) past.