Patterson Will Not Run Again
In a turn of events that he could not have possibly seen coming, New York Governor David Patterson won't seek re-election. Patterson has been plagued as of late with charges of corruption, cronyism and coercion.
Governor Patterson now has the unique distinction of being the guy who couldn't do a better job than the guy who had sex with high-priced hookers while his socks were still on.
When told of the news, similarly disgraced democratic governor Rod Blagojevich said, "Bro, we should get an apartment together... Maybe some kind of reality show or something."