Gustav v. Republicans

With Hurricane Gustav bearing down on the Gulf Coast, the Republican Convention has been radically shaken up. McCain's camp has announced cut backs on the first day, shaving down the podium schedule to 3-5 speakers, and promising to deal primarily with "business" on the Convention's first day.

There are reports that McCain may even accept his party's nomination via satellite from the site of a relief effort on the Gulf Coast later this week. Whether or not, he makes his speech in a parka, with waves breaking behind him at the beach like a Weather Channel correspondent remains to be seen.

President George Bush has also canceled his speaking engagement at the Convention on Monday, as has Vice President, and prototype cyborg, Dick Cheney. Both have opted out in order to be closer to the relief effort as the storm touches ground on the Gulf Coast. Which is probably for the best.

Because the last major storm to hit the U.S. was Hurricane Katrina in 2005. And in case you forgot, Vice President, and occasional face shooter, Dick Cheney was in Wyoming when Hurricane Katrina hit, taking in some fly fishing. And while Americans drowned and a city was nearly laid to waste, George Bush was hopping a plane to Arizona, to wish a very Happy Birthday to his good pal... John McCain.